Jonathan Currinn
Negative people in your life can be both helpful and detrimental. They literally bring you down from that high positive outlook you have on life.
These are the sorts of people I don’t like being in my life, and yet I find a way to be grateful to them because I turn their negative energy into bettering myself and making myself more positive.
People who are always negative are probably like that because they want to bring others down. They aren’t happy with their own life and they’re not doing anything to change it. Sometimes it can be jealousy, sometimes it’s envy, sometimes it’s just because they can. Whatever the reason, there is no justification they could possibly say to make it up to me. They are the bullies of the adult world and most of the time they don’t even know it.
If you have one of these people in your life, and you can’t deal with their negativity; take a look at what I do, and hopefully I’ll be able to help you with dealing with this person.
1. Ignore Them
This is the first step. Stop fighting with them, stop allowing them to win, stop arguing, don’t agree, just ignore them. Start changing the subject as soon as they start being negative, or don’t even reply to them at all. Sometimes it sounds like your agreeing with them, sometimes they don’t even realise you’re doing it.
How does this help? I hear you ask, well it stops them from expanding what they are saying, it prevents it from going on and on and on; and it’s closing your feelings off to that person. They are negative because they expect a response, they know it will be turned into a debate allowing them to elaborate on what they mean, but by ignoring what they have said it prevents them from going anywhere. It makes them realise that you’re not listening, and occasionally it makes them question what they’re saying. Is there any point in saying something if the person who’s supposed to be listening, isn’t?
2. Forget What They’ve Said
After ignoring them, you’ll realise their words still swim around your brain; stinging you like a jellyfish every time you think about it. Zap Zap Zap. But if you forget what they said, then it won’t poison your mind. You don’t have to bang your head against the wall to damage brain cells and remove the words; just focus on everything else and never let the words fully sink in.
Ignoring them in the first place is like not hearing them anyway, it’s half the step; you just need to complete the step by disregarding what they’ve said. Negativity just isn’t needed in your life, and people who are constantly sending negative thoughts, feelings and actions your way, doesn’t deserve to have you in their lives.
There has been plenty of times when the negative person in my life has tried to dictate me, attempts to make a joke out of the life I’ve chosen and the decisions I have decided to take; definitely takes it’s toll, but the sooner I forget what this person has said, the sooner I continue my positivity and determination to do what I want, to get the career I want, to move to the city I want to be in. To be me.
3. Allow Their Comments To Fuel You
Turn their negativity into positivity, whilst they’re talking and you’re ignoring them, twist their words in your head so that it’s positive words going in. If they say: “You can’t”, say to yourself: “You can”. Don’t let anyone determine what you want to do, just change their negative vibes into positive vibes that you can then channel.
Your life is your life and you should be able to do what you want with it.
4. Have Positive & Encouraging People In Your Life
Sometimes negative people manage to get inside your head; hell, some days you just can’t keep fighting and their words have totally brought you down. By this point you need at least one person to bring you back up, there’s always someone out there who is full of positive energy ready to send your way both on the good days and the bad days. Yet, it’s not always down to them, all it takes is for you to send a simple message like: “Hi how are you?” before they send positive vibes your way. Usually, these people do it without them even knowing that they’ve picked you right back up.
Personally, I have plenty of friends and family members I turn to regularly. There have been many times I’ve got off a phone call with someone and I’m buzzing for no reason. This is because that person has so much positive energy, even when they’re feeling low themselves; just talking to them builds me back up. It’s not just phone calls, though; it happens when we’re messaging, texting, or just meeting up. I am grateful for every positive person in my life; they all support me, contribute to my happiness, and encourage me to go after my dreams.
5. Prove Them Wrong
This is definitely the hardest of them all, but the main thing is that if you manage to prove them wrong then their entire negativity towards that one thing becomes irrelevant. The best way, I’ve found, is turning their negativity into a competition; if they say it’s not possible, or that you can’t; go and do it anyway, end of the day, it’s your life. Go and do what you want to do and prove you were right all along. If they were wrong about one thing then they’re wrong about all the other things too.
Eventually, they realise that negative words and phrases sent your way are having the complete opposite effect. Make it push you to live your life the way you want to.
6. Smile
This is the easiest one, yet the most frustrating for them. How dare you smile when they’re trying to bring you down. Smile like you’re having the best day ever, even when you’re not. This is also a great technique to cheer totally random strangers up. That person who smiles at you on the street may just make your day. So start smiling more and you’ll realise others will smile back. Start spreading positivity and you’ll receive it in turn.
That’s all the helpful tips you need. I hope they help you to deal with your negative person in your life. Sometimes they’re detrimental, not just on life itself but also on your health. Be positive, be confident, be determined, have courage, and believe in yourself. Because I believe in you!
If these helped you out, don’t forget to mention us in a tweet @Fuzzable. If you have any tips we didn’t include, tell us what helps you deal with a negative person, on Twitter.
